Behind Closed Doors
by indescribablyBee
Summary: Story of marauders love lives. This fic contains SLASH. PArticularly of the malemale variety. Pure unadultarated FLUFF! Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1: Waiting

**Disclaimer:** Not mine. Never will be. But don't worry I'm over it. –Kicks wall angrily-.

**A/N:** This fic contains SLASH! If you don't like it don't read it. Simple as that. This chapter is from Remus' POV as will most of the story be. Anyway, hope you like!

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**Chapter 1: Waiting**

I am lying here, waiting. Waiting for Sirius to yell out in his sleep. He's had nightmares for the past four nights. He won't tell me what they're about. He never tells me what they're about. He lets me comfort him though. He falls asleep in my arms, and I watch as his expressive dark eyes cloud over and flutter shut. I love how his dark shoulder-length hair caresses my skin. I love the feeling of his body against mine. Of his heart against mine. So I wait here. For him to call out. So I may comfort him and break my heart, as I have to let him go once more. I am doomed to this existence.

My name is Remus Lupin and I'm in love with my best friend, who just happens to be a guy.

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**A/N:** For those of you who are sitting there saying, "What? That's it?" don't worry, 'cause it's not. There is definitely more coming, but you should review anyway. This way I won't become disheartened and leave it this way. Hope you liked! 

Bee


	2. Chapter 2: Plans

**Disclaimer: **Not mine. Don't sue me.

**A/N:** Here's the next chappie! Hope you like it!

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**Chapter 2: Plans**

"Hey Remmy! Wake up!" I woke with a start.

"What? Siri, it's too early!" He laughed.

"Oh Remmy, it's not early! It's almost lunch. And anyway, me and Wormy need your help." I sat up and yawned. Sirius was practically bouncing off the walls. I love the spark in his eyes when he's that excited.

"What do you need my help with? I thought you were copying James' astronomy homework this time." Sirius laughed. _I love his laugh. It's so much like a dog barking._

"First of all, it's not about homework. Second of all, I can't copy James' because he drew a fish and just connected the stars."

"Why a fish?"

"It was easier than Evans? I don't know! Anyway, me and Wormy need your help getting James and Lily together." His eyes got that mischievous spark that is so endearing to me.

"No way. You remember what happened last time. With the spikes and the stick." Sirius whimpered and grabbed his butt.

"I forgot about that."

"How could you? You couldn't sit down for about a week." _I know because you had to sit on my lap for a good deal of it_. Sirius whimpered again, remembering Lily's rage.

"All right, I'll help you." Sirius looked shocked. "I figure someone's got to make sure Lily doesn't kill you." _With any luck she'll do something like last time and he'll have to sit on my lap again._ Sirius laughed again.

"Well, come on!" He grabbed my hand and pulled me out of bed. I stood there in boxers. Sirius had already started walking towards the door.

"Uh, Padfoot?" He turned around and saw my shirtless self. Something like hunger flickered in the depths of his eyes, but then the wall went up and he spoke nonchalantly.

"Oh, if you must." I laughed and walked over to my trunk to get clothes.

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I came out of the bathroom showered and dressed. Sirius grabbed my arm and dragged my down the stairs. If my basic instinct hadn't kept my feet in motion I would've frozen at Sirius' touch.

As it was, the only thing that kept me from blushing furiously was that this touch was completely free of emotion. On Sirius' part anyway.

We came into the common room and Sirius dragged me towards the portrait hole. I grabbed Peter's shirt as I went along and we were dragged downstairs to a broom closet.

"Guys! Let me out!" James' voice was heard from the other side of the door. I looked at Sirius with the quizzical look I reserved for him. He laughed at my confusion.

"James, here," He jerked his thumb over his shoulder at the broom closet. "Is currently trapped in there alone. But soon," His voice took on a dramatic quality. "We will get darling Lilykins in there with him, and we will not let them out until they snog for ten minutes."

"You do realize that Lily will probably castrate him." I pointed out. Sirius let out a bark of laughter.

"Yeah. But there's always the possibility that they'll get together in there."

"I suppose."

"Sh! Here she comes!" Peter let out a squeak of excitement. I had forgotten he was with us.

"Hey Lil-a-bee!"

"Black. What's with the new nickname?"

"It just came to me. I liked it. You should be honored by all the attention you get from me." Lily laughed.

"You're right Sirius. I am very honored." Sirius rolled his eyes at her mocking tone, and sighed exasperatedly.

"I have something to show you!" He pulled Lily around the corner, opened the broom closet and shoved her in. We heard the muffled shrieks of rage and pain, as well as James' grunts of surprise.

Sirius told his two victims the terms of their release. Lily told him to go do something that is technically anatomically impossible. Then she said that he wouldn't have any proof either way, anyway, so she and James could be stuck there for days.

Sirius thought for a moment and then grabbed my arm. I froze at his touch. Then he opened the closet door and shoved me in. I landed on top of Lily and James.

I took out my want and enlarged the broom closet so that I could sit comfortably. I sat down by the door and muttered darkly to myself. Lily, I saw, was doing the same thing across from James. James was rubbing his shoulder where a bucket fell on him, when Lily was thrown in.

For a few moments we sat there in silence. Then my enlarging charm wore off and we were flung at each other. Lily into James' arms, and me into the wall. I did the enlarging charm again and lay sprawled out on the floor, rubbing my head.

"Are you all right?" Lily asked concernedly. I waved away her question, not making a move to sit up. I closed my eyes. They thought I had blacked out. I heard snatches of their conversation.

"…what else is there to do…"

"…who knows when they'll be back…"

"…nothing for it…"

"…no one's looking…"

Then the talking stopped and I heard an odd sucking noise. I heard James moan out Lily's name and when I opened my eyes they were snogging passionately.

"Urgh!" I sat up and leaned against the wall. I renewed the enlargement charm while they broke apart. Lily was blushing furiously.

"We thought you were asleep." Lily burst into giggles and James looked slightly sulky at having been interrupted. A knock on the door made Lily stop giggling.

"Hey Remmy!"

"Mmm." _My head hurts_.

"Did they snog yet?"

"Mmm-hmm." The door opened. Lily and James stood up and walked out of the closet, hand in hand, much to the amusement of Sirius and Peter.

"Aren't you coming out Remmy?"

"Uh-uh." _My head hurts more than I expected._

"What? Too traumatized to…" He broke off seeing me propped up against the wall, my face a mask of pain. Something red trickled down into my eyes. I realized I was bleeding. "Oh Merlin, Remmy!"

"Shit." I lost consciousness.

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I woke up in the Hospital Wing to someone stroking my hair. My left hand was held tight in someone else's. I opened my eyes and looked up into Sirius' face. His whole face lit up at the sight of me awake. I realized he still held my hand. He had stopped stroking my hair though.

"So, Remmy. Aren't you going to tell me what happened?"

"You're going to laugh." I made sure to use the long-suffering voice that makes Sirius laugh.

His eyes were laughing at me, but the rest of his face looked somber. He held up three fingers, and closed his eyes.

"I, Sirius Black, promise not to laugh at the story of my dearest Moony." _He called me his dearest Moony. Oh gosh. I sound like a first-year girl._

"Fine. I put an enlargement charm on the room and when it wore off, I got flung into the opposite wall." Sirius looked like he wanted to go pummel the wall. "Then I closed my eyes and lay down for a second, and Prongs and Lily decided they might as well eat each others' faces." Sirius' eyes were laughing hysterically at me, but his mouth just barely smiled.

"You know what this means Moony?" He asked squeezing my hand excitedly. _He's squeezing my hand!_

"What does it mean Padders?"

"It means the plan worked! We got James and Lily together!"

"Padders, I hate to break it to you, but from my position they certainly seemed like they were already together. Especially from the way James' hand was up Lily's shirt." Sirius shuddered.

"Did you have to tell me that?"

"Oh puh-lease. Like you never had your hand up a girl's shirt before." Sirius looked uncomfortable. He dropped my hand and started twisting his hair nervously with his fingers.

"Wait. You haven't?" Sirius shook his head. "Oh, well. Whatever." _Does this mean that Sirius doesn't like girls? Maybe he's like me!_ "I won't tell anyone. About you, I mean." His eyes darkened.

"What do you mean "about me"?"

"I just meant, that your not really a big player like everyone thinks." He looked relieved, and I was confused.

"Oh, yeah. Right." Sirius muttered distractedly. Unfortunately, I couldn't ask him any more questions, because Madam Pomfrey bustled over with her wand in one hand and a potion in the other.

"Well you're finally awake, then? Good." She examined my head. "It looks like it's all healed up, but you should take this in case the pain comes back." I took the potion and looked hopefully at her. "And you can go after that." Sirius pumped his fist in victory.

"I was planning a way to spring you from here anyway." Sirius told me after Madam Pomfrey walked away.

"Really?"

"Yeah. There's going to be a party tonight in the Room of Requirements to celebrate Lily and James. It's kind of like a bachelor party, only not. You couldn't miss it."

"Why is it so special?"

"We're gonna' get Wormy drunk again." The excited spark gleamed in his eyes and I laughed. We walked out of the Hospital Wing.

I'm arm in arm with my love.

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**A/N:** Hope you liked! Please review!

Bee 


	3. Chapter 3: Partying

**Disclaimer:** Not mine. Don't sue.

**A/N:** Here's the next chappie! Hope you like! Oh and sorry if I depicted the drinking and everything wrong or something like that, but my drinking would be like super illegal, so I don't claim to have a large knowledge about it.

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**Chapter 3: Partying**

Sirius and I walked into the Room of Requirements to find Peter and James already waiting there. They had crates of Firewhiskey with them.

"Finally!" James cheered excitedly. I looked apologetically at everyone.

"Sorry. You know how Pomfrey is." James waved his hand dismissively and opened a bottle of Firewhiskey. He took a swig and sighed contentedly. Then he passed a bottle to each of us.

Sirius opened his immediately and emptied a quarter of it in one gulp. I tentatively took a sip. Peter took small gulps and soon became very flushed. It didn't take much to get Peter drunk. On the other hand, Sirius had a very high tolerance and so it took a lot to get him drunk. James had to drink a decent amount, before he got drunk. I really didn't know how much I could drink before I became drunk, because I was always the last one so no one was left to tell me.

After a couple of minutes of our chugging down Firewhiskey, Peter suggested that we play Truth or Dare. Everyone agreed, so Peter went first.

"Srus. Trth of Dae?" Peter was officially drunk. Sirius thought for a moment.

"Dare."

"I dae yo to kis Rem…hic…us." Sirius looked at me hesitantly. I shrugged and he took a swig of Firewhiskey.

Our lips met for a second. _Not nearly long enough._ He didn't break away though. For at least thirty seconds we stayed like that. My senses heightened. His lips pressed firmly, but gently against mine. His eyes closed.

Then we broke apart. It took all my self-control not to moan out in disappointment. Sirius looked slightly shocked at my reception to the kiss. James looked slightly confused at our kissing for longer than need be. I thanked Merlin that he was mostly drunk and probably wouldn't remember this. Sirius looked up at the three of us.

"Okay, my turn. James, Truth or Dare?" He thought for a moment, considering what Sirius could do to him.

"Um…er…dare." He decided knowledge in Sirius' hands was for worse than anything else.

"Okay. I dare you to chug a whole bottle of Firewhiskey without stopping." James shrugged and grabbed a bottle. He was about to start when Peter passed out on him. He looked vaguely surprised but just pushed him off. Then he started to drink.

"Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!" Sirius chanted while I laughed excitedly.

James got about halfway through the bottle when he keeled over backwards. Sirius relieved him of the bottle and finished in off for him. I took another swig.

"Let's…let's play…Spin the Bottle." Words seemed to be a magnificent feat for Sirius.

"Okay." We sat. Peter and James were lying somewhere in the room, passed out.

An empty bottle was spinning in between us and then we were in a fierce lip lock. Then we were on the ground. Sirius was on top of me, his body like a blanket over mine. His mouth pressed up against mine passionately, almost desperately. His hands ruffled through my hair, and mine were tangled up in his.

His lips parted slightly and his tongue pried open my mouth. It explored all the caverns of my mouth and then I copied suit. Sirius tasted of Firewhiskey and Honeydukes chocolate.

We stopped briefly breathing erratically. Everything was extremely fuzzy. Then we started up again. His tongue almost choking me. His kisses were so furious, so desperate, but I didn't care.

I was making out with my love.

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**A/N:** If only someone would kiss me like that. Screw that, if only someone would actually kiss me. Anyways…I hope you liked it! Please review!

Bee 


	4. Chapter 4: Forgetting

**Disclaimer:** Not mine. Don't sue.

**A/N:** I know it took me a while to update. My only excuse is that school sucks and teachers give you homework just to torture you.

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**Chapter 4: Forgetting**

I woke up the next morning. My head felt like it was splitting open. I was on a cold stone floor and someone was lying next to me, their head on my bare chest. I realized I didn't have pants on. Thankfully, I had boxers on, and so did the person next to me. But that was it.

The person next to me was…Sirius? Why was I lying here with Sirius? Then it all came back to me. The passionate way he kissed me. I smiled slightly, and then grimaced. Any movement made my head pound furiously.

I vaguely considered smashing my head open against the ground, but it was too much effort to lift my head. Sirius stirred at my attempt. He was obviously less worse off then me.

After he registered where he was and what was going on, he sat up. Too abruptly however, and so toppled over.

I conjured two bottles of hangover potion and drank one. I immediately felt better and so sat up. I gave a bottle to Sirius, who accepted it wordlessly, and without looking at me. Sirius downed the potion in one gulp.

I stood up, got my pants and shirt on, and went over to wake up James. I conjured another bottle of hangover potion, and poured it down his throat.

"Ennervate." I said, and James' eyes flickered open. He tensed, preparing for the massive headache that awaited him. When nothing happened, he looked at me questioningly.

"Hangover potion." He nodded and sat up slowly. I conjured another bottle and gave it to Sirius, who woke Peter, and then poured it down his throat. I rolled my eyes as Peter spluttered and choked on the liquid.

When everyone was fully awake, we left the room. The door melted into the wall behind us. We walked carefully up to the dormitory. Peter and James immediately conked out on their beds, having drunk more than me and Sirius, and needing to sleep it off. Sirius lay down, but didn't sleep. I sat on my bed, thinking.

"Hey Remmy?" I looked over at Sirius.

"What is it Sirius?" Sirius fidgeted uncomfortably, sitting up.

"Um…well…about last night…"

"What about it?"

"Do you…um…do you remember it?"

"Um…well…actually, yes." I finished lamely.

"Oh. Well…er…what do you want to do about it?" _Snog you passionately._ I sat thinking for a little while.

"Sirius, we were drunk." It killed me to say that, but he looked so sad. "Nothing b happened. James and Peter were passed out. So…um…."

"Do you just want to pretend it never happened?" He sounded vaguely hurt, but his eyes were impassive.

"Siri, I'll go along with whatever you want." _Even if it kills me._ I could feel my heart slowly ripping in two, but he didn't notice the pain in my voice.

"Probably for the best. We should just forget it. Sleep good Remmy." He lay down with his back to me and continued to mutter softly to himself. "All for the best…no one would understand…better this way…better this way." He sounded like he was trying to convince himself it would be better to forget it.

The muttering stopped after a little while, and I drifted into a fitful sleep.

It was night. It was all dark, except for the lone light on my nightstand I had forgotten to switch off. Sirius was standing over me.

"Remmy! Remmy! Remmy please wake up! Please wake up!" Sirius was shaking me awake. His eyes were hysterical and his voice was uncharacteristically high-pitched.

"Padfoot? What's the matter?"

"Moony please help me." I sat up. His voice was so urgent, so desperate, so terrified. I moved over and made room for him. He sat down shakily.

"What happened Siri?"

"She's here Moony! She's here! In the shadows! She won't leave me alone!"

"Who Siri? Who?"

"**Her!** She's calling me blood traitor, and she's yelling, and she's threatening to hurt you, and she won't leave me alone!" He threw his arms around my neck, and I suddenly understood. Sirius had had a nightmare about his mother. _Stupid bloody woman, hurting my Sirius._

I rubbed his back and whispered shushing noises in his ears. He calmed down after a few minutes and I gently lay him down next to me in my bed.

"Remus?" He asked, his eyes closed.

"Hmm?" I lay down beside him.

"I love you Remus." I froze, afraid he was joking, not daring to believe it. But his voice radiated sincerity and I felt myself believing him, against my better judgment.

"I love you too, Sirius. I love you too." He smiled and rolled over so my body was cupping his. He son fell asleep. I wrapped an arm around his waist and held him tight to me, and soon after, I fell asleep.

I was sleeping next to my love, who apparently loved me back.

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**A/N:** I know it's kind of short, but I thought that this was a good place to end. And, Sirius was a little OOC in this chapter, but I wanted to make him vulnerable enough to be able to confess to Moony. Anyways, please review!

Bee :)


	5. Chapter 5: Remebering

**Disclaimer:** Not mine. Don't sue.

**A/N:** Sorry it's been taking me so long to update all my stories and junk, but I got finals coming up and the teachers have decided to be evil, and kill us with homework. Anyway, here's the next chapter!

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**Chapter 5: Remebering**

I awoke the next morning to snickers. I opened my eyes and found James standing over me, his eyes bright with barely silent laughter. I just lay there a moment, trying to figure out why he was standing there laughing at me, and then I felt Sirius twitch slightly, next to me. I rolled away in shock and fell with a crash on the floor.

"Wuzgoinon?" Sirius awoke at the sound of me hitting the floor. Then he looked around and remembered where he fell asleep. He saw James laughing at him and me, and he saw me on the floor. "What'cha doin on the floor?"

"Why are you on Moony's bed Padfoot?" Sirius blushed and mumbled something unintelligible.

"He spilled Butterbeer all over his, so I shared." I lied.

"Why didn't he just magically dry it, or conjure another bed?" _When did James get smarter?_ I banged my head against the bed post.

"James you ask yourself that question and then think of who you're talking about."

"Yeah, but you're not an idiot."

"Hey! I'm not an idiot!" Sirius said angrily.

"Sure you're not Padfoot."

"I'm not!"

"Fine. Whatever. Moony, why didn't you think to use magic?" I desperately struggled to come up with something.

"Have you ever asked me something in the middle of the night?"

"No." He answered confusedly.

"Let's just say, if you did, last night the answer would've been chickens."

"Chickens?" James looked at me like I was crazy.

"Yes, chickens. I had chicken for dinner, and I was dreaming about dancing chickens." James started to laugh. Sirius looked at me confusedly, but saw the guilt in my eyes and so didn't say anything.

"You know…for a second there…I thought that you…that you two were…together." I exchanged a nervous glance with Sirius. "Wait…are you?" Neither of us answered. I looked at the floor and Sirius stared around the room. "You are! I knew it! Well, Lily knew it, but I found out first!"

"James, we're not together." I said. Sirius looked hurt, so I subtly mouthed "Yet." To him, and he immediately brightened.

"Oh. Okay. Whatever. I'm hungry. I'll be down in the Great Hall if you need me." He strode toward the door and turned around airily. "Oh and Moony?"

"Yeah, Prongs?" He grinned mischievously at me.

"I saw the "yet"." The door closed with a snap and I resumed banging my head against the bedpost. Sirius hopped off the bed and kneeled down next to me. He grabbed my head in his hands to stop me from banging it anymore. Our faces were so close.

"Did you mean what you said Remmy?"

"What'd I say?" I asked raising one eyebrow in confusion. He smiled at my ignorance.

"Last night. When you said you loved me. Did you mean that?" I was shocked that he actually remembered what I said last night. I had thought he was asleep.

"Yeah Siri. I really did." Our foreheads were touching, Sirius' hands still cradling my head.

Then suddenly, he pressed his lips to mine, softly at first, and then with a desperation of long pent up passion. My hands reached up and entangled deep in his hair. We broke the kiss a few moments later, gasping for air.

"I'm going to take that as a sign that you meant what you said last night, too." I said, and he laughed softly.

* * *

Me and Sirius walked down into the common room after taking a quick shower. As soon as my feet hit the floor, arms were thrown around my neck.

"I'm so happy for you!" Lily positively shrieked into my ear. I stood there confused and she broke the hug and hurried over to Sirius. She hugged him and then walked over to where James was sitting.

"Lily? Why are you happy for me?" I asked confused. She laughed.

"I am happy for you _and_ Sirius." I stood there, with one eyebrow quirked upward in confusion. "I am happy for you two, _together._" I blushed.

"Lil-a-bee, I'm glad you're happy, but what you are isn't my-two-friends-just-got-together happy. What you are is I-did-somehting-naughty-with-my-boyfriend happy." Lily stuck her tongue out at Sirius.

"How would you know? Oops. Forgot. You would know." Lily teased, grinning like mad. He stuck his tongue out at her…_I can think of a better use for that tongue_…and lunged at Lily, but James pulled her over the couch and into his lap. Sirius veered off course and landed on top of me.

"Sirius I am shocked! Remus, you too! This is a common room for goodness sake!" Lily said in mock dissaproval, doing a very good impression of Professor McGonnagal.

"I don't get it." James said. Lily whacked him lightly on the head.

"James, look. Sirius is on top of Remus. They are dating. Fill in the blanks dammit!" James, Sirius, and I all gasped. "What?"

"You just cursed!" Sirius exclaimed.

"So?"

"So you never curse. Ever." I pointed out. Lily pouted.

"Well I'm glad you all think I'm a prude."

"Lily we don't think you're a prude." James said. Lily ignored him. "lily we don't. Really!" He practically shouted at her.

"Bastards." James gasped again and covered her mouth with his hand.

"Lily! This is a common room! I'm ashamed of you! There could be first years about!" James said mocking her. Lily bit him. "Oi! Bloody hell! What was that for?" Lily just smiled innocently, kissed him lightly on the cheek, and left for breakfast. James followed after her nursing his finger.

"Um, Sirius?" I asked after the portrait hole shut.

"Yeah Remmy?"

"Can you get off me now? Your crushing my pancreas." Sirius didn't move.

"But I don't want to get up Remmy!" He whined pitifully.

"Please Sirius? Don't you want to get breakfast?" He got off me begrudgingly.

"Fine. Let's eat." I stood up, dusting my self off. "Remmy, come on! Food!"

"Padfoot, wait a second." I said mimicking his tone. He stuck his tongue out at me, and I laughed. "Siri, you're such a girl." He fluttered his eyelashes at me.

"Maybe, but I'm _your_ girl." I laughed and headed for the portrait hole, but Sirius beat me to it. As soon as he jumped through, I heard him call out a challenge.

"Race ya!" I scrambled out of the portrait hole, laughing, and running to catch up to Sirius.

_I was having fun with my love, who loved me back. And he was my boyfriend. Could my life get any better?_

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**A/N:** I'm not sure if I want to just have that be the end or what. When you guys review you can tell me what you want. Maybe I will leave it there and just do like an epilogue or something. I don't know. Review and tell me what you think, please!

Bee :)


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